RELATIONSHIP ATTACHMENT THERAPY • CHICAGO & ACROSS ILLINOIS
You Keep Going Back
Even though it huts.
Even though you lose yourself every time.
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In-Network Insurance
We accept major insurance plans, including Blue Cross Blue Shield and Aetna PPO. Verify your benefits easily.
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Virtual Sessions Available
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You Said You Were Done
Then he called, and you felt relief. Not happiness relief. For a moment, everything felt settled again. Then later, you asked yourself why you picked up. You already knew how it would go. You explain, he half-hears you, things soften, then the distance returns. And somehow you're back in the same place again.
You’re not confused about the relationship.
You’re confused about yourself.
And Than Confusion Is Changing You
Your confidence is shrinking. You talk yourself out of what you know. Your life pauses around his responses.
You know what you need. You can say it clearly. But somehow his needs always come first. You put yours on the back burner, telling yourself you'll address them later.
This isn't just frustrating.
It's changing how you see yourself.
This is usually the moment you realize you can’t keep. doing this.
You Don’t Tell People
You don't tell people how long it's been. You're afraid of being judged for staying. So you carry this alone.
You worry that if you leave, he'll find someone else and you'll realize you were the problem all along.
You're afraid you'll be alone forever. That you won't find love again.
So you focus on the good times to make staying bearable.
You remind yourself of his better qualities
This Is For You If
✔️ You keep going back even though it hurst
✔️ You respond to contact even though you promised yourself you wouldn’t
✔️ You say what you want, but you end up doing what he wants
✔️ You feel like you’re losing yourself, but you can’t stop
✔️ You’re tired of restarting the same cycle
This Has a Name
What you're experiencing is called an attachment loop. Your nervous system learned that inconsistent connection is better than no connection. So when he reaches out your body reacts before your mind decides.
This isn't weakness. It's intermittent reinforcement—the same mechanism that makes slot machines addictive.
That's why logic doesn't hold and promises to yourself don't stick.
The pain isn't just in what he does. It's in what you keep doing to yourself—choosing him over you, putting your needs aside, waiting for the right time that never comes.
No one pushes you to leave.
No one judges you for staying.
No one asks you to be strong here.
This is the one place you don’t have to defend staying or promise you’ll leave.
You don't just talk about the relationship. You slow down the moment your body reacts and change what happens next time. You leave sessions reacting differently, not just thinking differently.
We focus on the exact moment you lose yourself—the pause before replying, the urge to explain, the hope that this contact means change. Instead of fighting the reaction you understand it while it's happening.
That's where things actually start to shift.
What Actually Changes
✔️ You notice the pull earlier
✔️ You don’t respond automatically
✔️ Contact stops shaking your whole day
✔️ You stop arguing with yourself afterward
✔️ You start choosing yourself without guild
These aren't philosophical shifts. They're nervous system changes that happen through repeated practice in session.
What Happens in the First Session
1. You tell me what brought you here
Most people start with 'I keep going back' or 'I can't stop thinking about him.' That's enough. We don't need a full history on day one.
2. We identify the exact moment you lose yourself
The pause before you text back. The moment you see his name. The urge to explain one more time. We map where your nervous system takes over.
3. You leave with one thing to practice
Not a big decision. Just one small interruption to the pattern. Something you can actually do before the next session.
Most people begin therapy still talking to him still unsure still hoping and doubting at the same time. You don't need clarity before therapy clarity is usually why people come.
Common Questions
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That's normal. Most people do. We figure out why you go back so you can stop.
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No. This is the one place you don't have to defend staying or promise you'll leave.
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Almost everyone does at first. That feeling fades quickly once you realize you're not being judged.
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There's no set timeline. Some people feel steadier within a few months. Others stay longer. You move at your pace.
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You don't have to be. Most people aren't. They're just tired of how it feels."
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We don't just talk about the relationship. We work with your nervous system in real time—so you react differently, not just understand more.